<div><span style="font-family: arial, sans-serif;"><b>Close Your Eyes</b></span></div>
<div><span style="font-family: arial, sans-serif;"><b>Written by Jordan Taylor Dubin</b></span></div>
<hr />
<p>Close your eyes<br />
Imagine turning on your phone<br />
Opening up Facebook<br />
And immediately seeing the words<br />
“Pray for CHAMPS<br />
Shooting on campus”</p>
<p>Close your eyes<br />
Imagine all of the air<br />
Being taken from your lungs<br />
A silent drowning<br />
To go with a punch in the gut<br />
CHAMPS was your high school<br />
CHAMPS is your sister’s high school</p>
<p>Close your eyes<br />
Imagine having to walk to class<br />
Like a 21-year-old with Parkinson’s<br />
Tears filling your eyes<br />
Fear filling your entire being</p>
<p>Close your eyes<br />
Imagine calling your mom<br />
The phone shaking against your cheek<br />
You hear<br />
“She’s okay”<br />
But not feeling an ounce of relief</p>
<p>Close your eyes<br />
Imagine texting your sister multiple times in a row<br />
Telling her that you love her<br />
Telling her that everything will be okay</p>
<p>Close your eyes<br />
Imagine that the only response from your sister<br />
Is a kissy face emoji<br />
Realizing that the words you have written<br />
Are an unconscious form of self-protection</p>
<p>Close your eyes<br />
Imagine clearly remembering news from two days ago<br />
September 20, 2018<br />
As if it is happening now<br />
Repeatedly happening</p>
<p>Close your eyes<br />
Imagine being miles and miles away<br />
From your baby sister<br />
Your best friend<br />
Who is not physically hurt<br />
But mentally and emotionally destroyed</p>
<p>Close your eyes<br />
Imagine knowing that no one was killed<br />
But a teacher<br />
A student<br />
And innocent bystanders<br />
Were shot and injured<br />
They will be okay<br />
Trying to find relief in those words<br />
Trying<br />
Trying<br />
Trying</p>
<p>Close your eyes<br />
Imagine being brought back to a conversation<br />
That happened months ago<br />
After coming home from CPR and First Aid training<br />
Telling your mom that you had to prove you knew<br />
What to do in the case of an active shooter</p>
<p>Close your eyes<br />
Imagine your mom telling you<br />
“If that happens, you have to call me”</p>
<p>Close your eyes<br />
Imagine her eyes fill with tears<br />
When you say<br />
“I won’t be able to. I’m the teacher<br />
And those are my babies<br />
I can’t call my mom<br />
When I’m theirs”</p>
<p>Close your eyes<br />
Imagine sharing the news with your friends<br />
Them asking if you’re okay when you’re silent<br />
Them on their phones when you’re vocal<br />
They don’t want to hear about a school shooting<br />
I can’t say I blame them</p>
<p>Close your eyes<br />
Imagine seeing a post from your favorite English teacher<br />
Reading that he was teaching when everything started<br />
All he said was<br />
“Oh.<br />
Gunshots.<br />
Great.”</p>
<p>Close your eyes<br />
Imagine seeing a long and detailed post from your mom<br />
Reading that she cried all the way to CHAMPS<br />
Standing outside<br />
Watching her baby through a third-floor window<br />
For hours<br />
Unable to get to her</p>
<p>Close your eyes<br />
Imagine standing against and on your bed<br />
Seeing that Facebook post over<br />
And over<br />
And over again<br />
Tears streaming down your face<br />
Someone who takes care of others before herself<br />
Always before herself<br />
Could not take care of people she loves</p>
<p>Close your eyes<br />
Imagine your sister at home<br />
Her comfort zone<br />
FaceTiming her<br />
A forced smile on your face<br />
Greeted by a fearful little girl<br />
Numb<br />
Disguised as a monotone monster</p>
<p>Close your eyes<br />
Imagine your mom telling you<br />
That your sister and all of the kids in the class<br />
Hid under their desks without having to be told</p>
<p>Close your eyes<br />
Imagine a room full of kids knowing what to do<br />
During a lockdown<br />
Exactly what to do<br />
Because it has become the norm</p>
<p>Close your eyes<br />
Imagine living in a world<br />
Where seeing news<br />
About a school shooting<br />
Has become an almost everyday occurrence<br />
Welcome to America</p>
<p>Close your eyes<br />
Imagine feeling so guilty for feeling that way you do<br />
Reminding yourself that<br />
It wasn’t Columbine<br />
It wasn’t Sandy Hook<br />
It wasn’t Parkland<br />
It was CHAMPS<br />
And no one died<br />
Not one person<br />
You weren’t even there<br />
It’s not even about you<br />
But it still hurts</p>
<p>Close your eyes<br />
Imagine realizing that closing your eyes<br />
Won’t actually do anything to help<br />
Won’t help you<br />
Won’t help anyone<br />
The ally personality that has always<br />
Been a part of you<br />
Too afraid to come out and play</p>
<p>Close your eyes<br />
But you don’t have to imagine<br />
Because it’s true</p>
<div></div>
<div></div>
<p><span class="embed-youtube" style="text-align:center; display: block;"><amp-youtube data-videoid="wdLoN4i7mhw" data-param-rel="1" data-param-showsearch="0" data-param-showinfo="1" data-param-iv_load_policy="1" data-param-fs="1" data-param-hl="en-US" data-param-autohide="2" data-param-wmode="transparent" width="730" height="411" layout="responsive"><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wdLoN4i7mhw" placeholder><amp-img src="https://i.ytimg.com/vi/wdLoN4i7mhw/hqdefault.jpg" alt="YouTube Poster" layout="fill" object-fit="cover"><noscript><img src="https://i.ytimg.com/vi/wdLoN4i7mhw/hqdefault.jpg" loading="lazy" decoding="async" alt="YouTube Poster"></noscript></amp-img></a></amp-youtube></span></p>
<div></div>
<div>
<hr />
</div>
<div><img class=" wp-image-10513 alignleft" src="https://rockthepigeon.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/IMG_7068-7.jpg" alt="IMG_7068 (7)" width="260" height="419" /></div>
<div></div>
<div><em> </em></div>
<div><em><strong>Jordan Taylor Dubin</strong> is an actor, theatrical mover, writer, teacher, and huge musical theatre nerd. She was born and raised in Southern California and is now living out her 13-year dream of living in New York City. She holds a Bachelor of Arts degree in Dance &; Theatre Performance and Psychology from Mills College. During the day she works as a theatre teacher and staff associate at a college, and at night she&#8217;s an editing manager and freelance copy editor. Jordan is thrilled to have the opportunity to be published in Rock the Pigeon. </em></div>
<div></div>
<div class="yj6qo"></div>
<div class="adL" dir="ltr" data-smartmail="gmail_signature">
<div dir="ltr">
<div>
<div dir="ltr">
<div dir="ltr">
<div dir="ltr">
<div dir="ltr">
<div dir="ltr">
<div dir="ltr">
<div dir="ltr">
<div dir="ltr">
<div dir="ltr">
<div dir="ltr">
<div dir="ltr">
<div dir="ltr">
<div dir="ltr">
<div>Instagram: @arts_n_smarts</div>
<div></div>
<div>
<div>Twitter: @_arts_n_smarts_</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>

Close Your Eyes by Jordan Taylor Dubin [Poetry]
