
<p class="wp-block-paragraph"><strong>Anxiety by Jordan Nickel-Dubin</strong></p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Shhhhhhhhhhh</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Yeah right</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Never</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">You know how sometimes</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">You trip over something</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">And there’s a half second</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Where you’re not sure</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">If you’ll be able to catch yourself</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Or not</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">That half second of pure terror</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">That’s where I live</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Every</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Single</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Day</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">In that half second</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Possessed by demons</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">The fight for a cerebral cerebellum ;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Feeling out of control ;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Overcome by emotion ; ;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">My face a sauna of tears ;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">They say ;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Your strength overpowers the weakness ;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">You’re so powerful</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">No</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">I will lose</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">I am losing</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">I’m now lost</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">A consistent internal fight</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">With one’s greatest weapon ;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Intoxicated with hate</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">With pain</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">With disgust</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Of one’s own being</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Just breathe</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Inhale ;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Exhale ;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">I can’t</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Fighting to take in any air</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Let alone a deep breath</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Imagine losing control of your heart</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Your chest</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Physical pain ;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Knocking you down</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">No one can find out why</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Because no one believes you</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Hearing but not listening</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Writing but not accepting ;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">You begin to hate the words</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">“I understand”</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">A gentle hand on your arm</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Feels like needles</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Too much work to push it away</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">My life as a voodoo doll</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">18 months of consistent nausea</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Leaves me dry-heaving daily</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Even today</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">8 years later</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">The wound is still fighting ;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">To get dressed every day</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Shhhhhhhhhhh</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Yeah right</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Never</p>



<hr class="wp-block-separator"/>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph"><em> <strong>Jordan Taylor Dubin</strong> is an actor, theatrical mover, writer, teacher, and huge musical theatre nerd. She was born and raised in Southern California and is now living out her 13-year dream of living in New York City. She holds a Bachelor of Arts degree in Dance &; Theatre Performance and Psychology from Mills College. During the day she works as a theatre teacher and staff associate at a college, and at night she’s an editing manager and freelance copy editor. Jordan is thrilled to have the opportunity to be published in Rock the Pigeon. </em> Instagram: @arts_n_smarts Twitter: @_arts_n_smarts_</p>



<figure class="wp-block-image size-large"><img src="https://rockthepigeon.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/09/IMG_2555.jpg" alt="" class="wp-image-10924"/></figure>